Single and Loving It in Chicago

In the aftermath of Valentine’s Day 2013, I realize that, at the age of 24, I’m still single, and loving it – along with thousands of other individuals in Chicago (see map above). Even though my twin sister is engaged, and most of my close friends have significant others, I’m perfectly content grabbing dinner with friends in the suburbs of Chicago on the most romantic day of the year (as I did contentedly 24 hours ago). If I were to go out and look for love, it looks like, according to the map above and HuffPo article “Looking for Love? Where You Live Can Help Your Odds” by Jed Kolko, it looks like my best odds would be in the West Loop in Chicago – but right now, why go out and look for love when I’m single and loving it?

Given, it’s not easy to see and hear friends running around talking about the large bouquets they received and extravagant dinner dates their beaus have planned for them, but at the same time, the recent Atlantic article about how “everlasting love” doesn’t actually exist reminds me of the importance of desiring and abiding in God’s love more than in a romantic relationship. C.S. Lewis says it best, as summarized in this thinkChristian blog post:

C.S. Lewis’ The Four Loves should be required reading on Feb. 14, for his four-fold assessment of “God is love” – exploring affection, friendship, romance and charity – lays the groundwork for considering the beautiful diversity of love’s nature.

Christianity has the essential resources to account not only for the kind of love which can sustain a marriage, but also for love’s more daily, casual gestures between friends, neighbors, relatives and even strangers. In other words, Christianity can account for these “little moments of connection” as callings to “love your neighbor as yourself” and to exhibit the fruit of the Spirit in exhortations which inspire prosaic gestures – a handshake, a smile, a compliment, a knowing glance, an unexpected phone call, a cooked meal, a sacrificial helping hand – that fill our hearts with exceeding gladness (or “positivity resonance”).

I’m an evangelical Christian, so I believe the “guy will get the girl” and I will probably be “pursued” by my man when the time is right. Those truths help me to be patient and trust that God’s timing is never late, and help me to enjoy the company of my fellow humans – no matter their gender. In my opinion, and as I wrote in a 2012 blog post, “The War on Men” is a bunch of drama propagated by prideful feminists who have forgotten what it means to trust in the Lord for contentment.

I’m not about to go off the deep end and say “Jesus is my boyfriend,” but I am saying that if a man wants to date me, he’s gonna have to put Jesus first (this article by author Gary Thomas reminded me of priorities I should have in dating).

Our love ain’t happenin’ unless it’s burning like Pentecost, if you know what I’m saying. Here’s to singleness and hoping and trusting in the Lord!


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